omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
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