was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize