If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Randomize
