I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
