I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
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