she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
