I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize