Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
