this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
