I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Randomize
