Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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