I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
jump out the window naked night went bad
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