Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
