Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
