So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
His nipple licking is glorious
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