I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
