i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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