I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
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