i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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