K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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