The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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