There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i think i have herpe
just one?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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