I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
