Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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