he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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