we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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