I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize