in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
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