why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
