she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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