Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize