apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
