I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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