How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
