So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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