yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Randomize
