He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
