Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Do vagina's smell?
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
