we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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