What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
