my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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