I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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