Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
