You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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