ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
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