Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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