My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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