: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
