Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
false alarm, still single
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