can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
