An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
