so that wasnt chicken after all
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
